Tue, May 30 01:33 PM |Life

5 Things That Keep You From Finding a Healthy Relationship

When it comes to relationships, some stay in relationships that are consistent and happy, while others are happily single and able to successfully date. 

However, there are many people who are what you would call hopeless romantics. 

These are the people who no matter how good a situation is going, the relationships either don’t last long without dysfunction or end before they really start. 

When this consistently happens, it’s often because the person is their own worst enemy when it comes to dating, saying or doing things that keep a healthy relationship from flourishing. 

Here are 5 things that men and women often do to keep them from finding a healthy relationship. 

1.) Holding On To The Baggage

One thing will always ruin a relationship, whether it’s just starting out or has been going on for years: the ex or flame from the past sticking around. If a person isn’t with you, there’s a reason. Whether it’s someone who you didn’t feel was relationship material at the time, someone from a relationship that didn’t work, or that “friend with benefits” that’s still sticking around, that person is only a hindrance to your current relationship. Let that person go and move on before that person sabotages your relationship for their own benefit, or temptation causes you to make a mistake. 


2.) Letting Jealousy Take Over

Trust is something that is needed in every relationship. Without it, your relationship will be full of strife and will hardly have any peace. While wanting to protect what is yours is a natural reaction to love, becoming down right territorial and seeing competition when it’s not even there will turn even a sure thing away from you. Nobody, and I mean NOBODY wants to deal with someone CONSTANTLY wanting to check their phone and questioning them about their whereabouts whenever they don’t get a call back or a they take a little too long to reply back to a text. Learn to be secure with the fact that the person is only interested in you or you’ll definitely run them away with your insecurities. 


3.) Being Too Indecisive About Taking The Next Step

You’ve met someone and seem to have been hitting it off. The both of you are feeling the vibe and noticing the amount of chemistry you have. There’s only one issue: you’re not sure if you want to take it to the next level or not. It’s understandable that some people may not want to rush into things. However, nobody wants to wait forever just to get a little bit of clarity on what their status is with you. While you’re still deciding on where you really want to take the relationship, that person is more than likely eyeing potential spouses who are willing to take the next step. 


4.) Wanting To Win Petty Arguments Too Badly

“I’m the man and what I say goes!” “If that’s how he wants to play, then I can play even harder!” Believe it or not, most relationship ending situations end with those two quotes or something similar. While it’s okay to know how to put your foot down, often times we focus too much on winning arguments or coming out on top in situations that are simply petty and hold no real weight in the relationship. Sometimes, it’s best to let things go for the sake of having a healthy relationship. Constantly trying to check your significant other or “show them who’s boss” over non-factor situations is a sure fire way to make even someone who is madly in love with you move on. 


5.) Taking Everyone Else’s Advice To Heart 

Whenever you’re in a relationship, or get a potential bae, your friends and family are bound to be somewhat invested into the success of the relationship. However, you have to know the difference between helpful advice from friends and family and someone simply butting in. “If my man/woman did that I’d do this!” or “You need to check him/her!” are the things you’ll hear sometimes, but you have to know when it is warranted. You have to know the difference between someone who truly cares for you pointing out something to you in order to give healthy advice, and someone simply running their mouths and projecting their own insecurities regarding their love life onto yours. Not effectively doing this will cause unnecessary strife in your relationship, causing it to end prematurely. 

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